77 Zealous Inches

I feel special because I get to live with a true treasure of a person. For this tale I shall call him Grandpa Jake. He’s older than my dad so I thought Grandpa Jake would be a good alias.

He is a rare breed of wonder and I feel sorry for all the people who have never gotten the opportunity to watch him in action.

The story

One of the teens in our home came down with measles. Poor baby, which of course brings on the usual questions and concerns about quarantine etc.

This sets the stage for this tragically funny turn of events.

Email 1 from concerned mother to entire home:

Seems like * 4 year old cutie pie is coming down with measles… and I wouldn’t be surprised if all the kids follow suit. Anyway the question is, since it seems to be spreading quite quickly do we really want to quarantine within the home? Of course if someone is sick they aren’t going to be mingling with everyone for their own sakes and so they can rest etc. The question is, do I need to start keeping the kids separate, away from everyone etc. or is every one OK with not isolating everyone who gets sick at this point? Need to hear back from you soon—thanks ILY

* name changed

Email 2 from Steph in reply to entire home:

I read somewhere that if someone comes down with measles that 90% of
people in the same household will get it if they’ve never had it. Sooo
I dunno, personally if I don’t have it now and I’m just sick with the
flu I’d rather not get it but there isn’t much that can be done about
that now. Sorry I realize that’s not a yes or no answer I just don’t
know.

Email 3 from Grandpa Jake in reply to me:

Saying “Sooo I dunno” is definitely one of the symptoms of measles!

Email 4 from Grandpa Jake in reply to home:

I think we should all get it, especially Steph.

Email 5 from Grandpa Jake in reply to home:

Just to let everybody know, I got chicken pox when I was 47 and I almost jumped off the roof in Hungary. So if I get measles, can we please keep the windows closed upstairs when I go up and take a shower? “Taking a shower” was the excuse I used in Hungary. At least in Hungary there was snow on the ground to break my fall. If I were to do it here, I’d probably use the window over by the photocopy machine, just to let everybody know. (Zedekiah 14: 6).– Grandpa Jake

P.S. If you wouldn’t mind shooting up a little prayer that everyone get’s over the measles and that it doesn’t have any negative after effects. We’d appreciate it, truly.