77 Zealous Inches

I’m telling you, hang around in my Home just a few minutes after Home Council ends and you will always discover a jewel of some sort. Yesterday’s treasure is as follows:

So we decide during Home Council that we will put a sign-up sheet on the fridge where everyone lists some ideas for an inexpensive gift they want for Christmas to make it easier for their Christmas Angel* (*you know, pick a name from a hat etc. etc.) So….

Jules is sitting there after the meeting ends, minding her merry own business and pretending to be busy on her two-ton 1989 laptop, when she happens to overhear the following conversation between a nameless loving couple.

Wife: I’m going to list mascara on the sign-up sheet because I need some because mine is all dried out.

Husband: That’s so carnal, so earthly, so worldly. Pick something that has meaning and real value. You can’t take mascara with you to heaven.

Jules, speaking to the husband: So, what are you going to put on the list?

Husband: Beer.

Instead of asking you to work on eliminating stress, another way to say it would be: Don’t be proud, fearful, self-centered, independent, unprayerful, unwise, unkind, and vain.
—Stress Not

Are the GN’s getting better and better or what?

King Julien voices

Harem stuff

Foiled April Fool’s plans

Differnt hair color every three months

Your love of boring American foods

The knowledge that I could always get the latest music off of you

All my files on my computer being catagorized and organized

Your sporadic frenzied cleaning sprees

Your mad love for the Lord

Your PowerPoints

Your twitch

Your groupie streak

I’ll miss a great friend, fellow coffee advocate (I now have one less person to stand with me agaisnt the crowds of scoffers and apostates to that heavenly elixir of life), fellow PS lover, fellow excersise-hater, and fellow disciple. I know you’ll do great!

Oh jes

So I’m learning a stick shift.

By learning, I mean learning how to restart a car a whole, whole lot.

I feel like I’ve been honeymooning and happily married to the love of driving for ten glorious months and suddenly I find my Love has morphed into a moody, stubborn, emotional rollercoaster where I have to push all the right buttons at exactly the right time or else it’ll kill me, then restart, and kill me again.

My wise, patient, and long-suffering instructor has told me that I didn’t do bad for the first time and I am extremely grateful for the continence of my life and his and that the Lord kept us as I drove (if you can call it that) through the back roads, which seemed at the time like the Valley of the Shadow of Death. But still man, its freaky stuff.

That’s some intense choreography going on to make the darn thing move. Handbrake, clutch, shift to first, bring up your RPM’s, release handbrake, ease off the clutch and back again. I started practicing the moves at Home Council this evening. Freaky stuff.

All in all, it wasn’t quite so melodramatic. Must be a full moon that brings the drama out of me late at night. Pray for me though, I like living and I like all of my limbs intact and we’re going again tomorrow.

There comes a time when you just can’t avoid being sentimental. That time, for me, is now. I want to wrap my extra-long arms around each one who wrote/chatted/called/blogged/sang/gave presents/made sushi/got PnP’s/hugged me for my birthday. You made the transition into geezerhood so much easier and I love you all for it. This really was the bestest birthday ever, I felt so loved.

Wonderful things happened on my birthday, and the day after; Jason ate off a paper plate especially in my honor, Mike sang “God save the queen”, my little sister got her whole singing team to sing for me over the phone….AND…..get this, the DMV finally sent me my license! God be praised! Can it get any better?

If you feel like sending some prayers my way, here’s some new year prayer requests:

1.) Just about every aspect of my discipleship. Call on lots of keys, rebuke all the demons, and summon legions of good spirits for me will you?

2.) That I will kill the demon of lethargy and exercise at least a couple of times a week. It’s gotten so bad that after working out today for the first time in months, I unwrapped a piece of gum and realized I was too exhausted to chew it.

3.) After you’re done with those two, if its not too much trouble…..could you…..maybe…..pray for this?

(I promise this is the last time I’m embarrassing David French. It was just too easy this time, I couldn’t help it. I do need to stop with the whole crush thing though or it’ll be waaaaaaay too awkward for me to even consider going to WordStock next year.)